I'm ready for 2011

It's New Year's Eve and I generally don't make a big deal out of New Year's resolutions, but this year is different. Read my blog from a couple of weeks ago and you'll see why I'm ready to put 2010 behind me and ring in 2011!

I've given a lot of thought to what changes I want to make going into the new year. Like most of the rest of the world, I would love to lose weight BUT I'm making my resolutions a little more tangible for what I want to specifically focus on.

1. Fewer burgers & fries. You might think this should be easy to accomplish, but it really is easier said than done. I am in my car all day for work and have never liked packing a lunch to take in the car and generally go through a drive-thru somewhere in the area I'm working. It's hard to eat a salad when you're on the road and I don't generally care for fast food salads anyway so I'm going to have to be creative with this. Having 2 kids that keep us going in a million directions most evenings usually results in quite a few dinners out as well and the budget can't always handle a nice sit-down restaurant so this will also require some discipline.

2. Keeping a positive attitude. I have always had a tendency to look at the glass 1/2 empty when times are tough and I am determined to keep it 1/2 full in the coming year. As I reflected on the challenges of 2010, I was able to find joys and blessings that resulted in each trial and realized that I need to change my attitude to always focus on the positive. It will be tough to break a 35 year old habit, but I know I can do it with a conscious effort. I have SO much to be thankful for with a loving husband of 13 years who is a phenomenal father and is truly my soulmate, 2 fantastic children who make me feel like the luckiest mother in the world, a job that I absolutely love and gives me the balance that I need, and a faith that continually shows me He is watching over us.

3. Sensoring what I say and not being quite as open about myself. I have always been very open about myself and will almost always say whatever is on my mind. I've realized recently that others have occassionally used this for their own benefit and I've hurt myself by not sensoring who I share what information with. I also need to think before I speak more often. It's especially easy on social media formats these days for comments not to come across the way you intend and I need to think about the things I say (whether in person or online) to make sure they won't have a different meaning for the person hearing or reading my comment. I had a few instances this past year where I would have liked to take back or clarify some things that I said and am committed to watching this more closely in 2011.

4. Accepting that I can't please everyone and being ok with that. As a close friend pointed out recently, I am a people pleaser and it causes me so much pain and stress when I feel like I have let someone down. I had a situation recently where I mistakenly hurt someone (as a result of resolution #3 above) and no matter how much I tried to explain it was a misunderstanding, apologized for my wrong doing and asked for forgiveness...they just weren't having any of it. I cried, I lost sleep, I completely stressed out about it and then realized that I had done all that I could to make it right and that it is simply out of my hands now. Once I understand that, it felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I've worked closely with Ashley recently on how to handle situations that bring unwanted drama into her life. I've witnessed my amazing 11 year old daughter apologize for some wrongdoings on her part and extend an olive branch that was accepted by another young girl. If only we as adults could model this same behavior. I realized that was exactly what I had done, only my olive branch wasn't accepted and I needed to be ok with that. It's in God's hands and He knows whether or not that lost relationship was one that would be positive or negative in my life and I'm ok with that.

5. Strengthening relationships. This is the resolution that I am most excited about for 2011. Over the past year, I have had to end some relationships that were hurting myself and my family while watching other relationships flourish that bring a great deal of joy to my life. I've always had a difficult family dynamic and am eternally grateful for those who show me true love and acceptance despite my faults and misgivings. Living in CO keeps us a great distance away from those that we love and the kids haven't been able to develop the strong family ties that I would like them to. Over the past 5-6 years, my sister and I have become closer and closer and I cherish the almost daily phone calls and rare visits that we get to share. She is absolutely one of my best friends in the world and I am blessed to call her MY sister! I want to continue developing relationships like this with Mike's family, my extended family and my cherished "adopted" family. Facebook has been a true blessing in helping to strengthen bonds and develop discussions that probably wouldn't have happened otherwise due to the distance between all of us.

I know it's quite a list for someone who usually doesn't even make New Year's resolutions, but a great deal of thought was put into exactly what is most important to me as we enter 2011. I wish each of you joy, health and happiness in the New Year and welcome each of you to hold me accountable to all of my resolutions!